A chocking letter to gay son from his father

In Love, Prayer on August 8, 2012 at 2:34 pm

Corcovado jesus

Corcovado jesus (Photo credit: @Doug88888)



The father’s letter reads:


This is a difficult but necessary letter to write.

I hope your telephone call was not to receive my blessing for the degrading of your lifestyle.

I have fond memories of our times together, but that is all in the past.

Don’t expect any further conversations With me.

No communications at all. I will not come to visit, nor do I want you in my house.

You’ve made your choice though Wrong it may be. God did not intend for this unnatural lifestyle.

If you choose not to attend my funeral, my friends and family will understand.

Have a good birthday and good life. No present exchanges will be accepted. Goodbye, Dad.”

The son’s thoughts, via Reddit:

“It’s important to know just what this zealotry from Bryan Fisher, Maggie Gallagher, Dan Cathy, et al., does to everyday people.

I’ve never done drugs, was an excellent student, an obedient child (far less trouble than many of my classmates), didn’t drink until I was 22 because it terrified me, and have had just 1 speeding ticket in my life.

Yet I am still seemingly deserving of this terrible act of hate and cowardice that one person can place on another.

5 years on and I am still doing fine, though this letter saunters into my mind every once in a while. When it does, I say without hesitation: F**k you, Dad.”

Andy Towle at Towleroad, who first published the letter via Reddit, writes:

It’s an all too familiar situation for many LGBT kids out there. He’s right. The Dan Cathys of the world are giving tacit permission to parents to act this way. Shame on them.

On Reddit, the post has over 4000 comments and 2270 “up votes.” “Pretty nasty stuff” is what John Aravosis at AmericaBlog calls it, noting: This is how the religious right, and the Republican party that enables them, quite literally kill people. John M. Becker at Truth Wins Out shares a personal story, and adds: The shockingly cruel letter below, from a father to his newly-out gay son, has been spreading like wildfire through social media. When I first saw it posted on the Facebook profile of Hudson Taylor, an all-star wrestler and outspoken gay rights supporter, I knew I had to share it with you because it serves as a stark reminder of why the fight for LGBT equality and against religious extremism is so critical.

(it was found on the web page of The New Civil Right Movement)

I realy do hope that James know in himself that his father opinion has nothing to do with Love from Jesus Christ.I am Christian and I do not think that God said any one do punish in my name or anything like that.For Jesus Christ,Love is the only way!!


I am offering to be Your web mother until I live on this earth.I will cherish and love You like my own son who has moved into the Heaven.

Please,what ever You do do not hate Your father.That way,one day You will become like He.

Be better.Be wiser.Be proud for being beloved child of God and do believe me,no one on this earth can take God’s love towards You.

James,You will remain in my praysers forever as much as Your friend.

  1. Many days I was thinking what to write or should I write back.Finally I decide I need to say one thing:with all my respect towards You,I must say that my opinion is different.As a lesbian and someone who believe in Jesus Christ as my Savior I know that God created me that way.I can not change.What does it means to change?
    My love?Believe me,many of us,are more sensibile,more tender,more gentle then heterosexuals.My love will never ever hurt any one on this world.I live my life with prayers more then people I know from the official Church.I am thinking about each word I am now writing cause I do not want to hurt Your fillings.
    I do apriciate Your opinion and Your coming into my blog so please try to understand me.
    So,tell me,please,what is a problem then??
    Why are You calling love sin?

  2. My heart is broken for this amazing young man. My son is gay and never in a million years would my husband and I treat our child like this. Do we agree ? No we do not . Do we understand? No we do not. But we love our son and there is nothing else. So many of his friends have had the same thing happen to them including his long time partner and our son in law.No they are not married but that does not change the way we love them both. Does God approve I do not know I am not God. But I do know God gave me a son and he gave me a heart and He taught me to love. My son knows this and never for a moment had a worry that we would stop loving him. Our other son and daughter are not gay but they love their brother. Anyone in our presance is not there long if they show their displeasure,
    My husband and I visited our son and son in law for New Year and we went to a house party with them to their friends home. Out of 20 people there our son was the only one who had parents that still talked to them. We for that night had a room full of adopted kids. My heart ached for these wonderful sons.

    • Dear Chris,
      I am so honored to know little bit of You,that part what is amazing.It is always enough for me for loving that kind of people such as You.You’re love is always enough.
      Your son is lucky one for having such parents but O do know deep down in my heart that You’re both lucky to have son like Yours.
      You said perfectly well;we are not God’s.In moment when we embrace someone with all our love,that’s all what God want from us.
      You know that I am lesbian,almost whole my life,I had parents who disowned me when I was 18th so my heart is full with love when I read that some of my friends have real parents.
      I wish You and whole Your family a very good life in future.May God bless each and every one of You.
      With love,milena

      p.s.Thank You Christ for sharing Your story with all of us!!

  3. God hates the sin, never the sinner. He let his son be beaten, stabbed and expire in public naked… because he loved the sinner. It was the only way to bridge the gap between man and God after Adam turned his back on God.

    As for the father? They say love and hate are the two strongest emotions in a person. I say there can be a third. That of the revulsion against something one finds to be against their nature, whether by genetics or learned. Eg: Suicide, intentional self harm, killing innocent people, molesting children, parental and sibling sex and yes, engaging in sex with your own gender. In today’s ‘enlightened society’ we applaud all of the prior as revolting except for the last. Meanwhile God still considers them all acts deserving to be called detestable. My words? No his. But…
    God gives each and everyone of us a burden or ‘cross’ to bear.( 2nd Corinthians, Chapter 12, verses 7-10. It may be our beauty or lack of, too much or the lack of money, a physical defect…whatever. We are to bear our burden using the Lords help. For gays, God loves you but has not changed his opinion on same sex. I’m sorry, but it is still wrong in his eyes no matter how you spin it. All he ask is that whatever burden he has placed on you, that you turn to him instead of acting on it.
    My friend is (was) an active cross dresser. After accepting Christ as his savior he began to question whether or not his cross dressing was a personal cross having to be borne. We, his friends never condemned him nor made him feel guilty. It was between him and the Lord. He later told us. In prayer, he was gently told that the desire to cross dress would never recede but that as a new creature, it was something God wanted him never to act on again. It was his cross and God loved him, supported him and gave him inner joy even though at times the drive to cross dress was strong.
    Did God stop loving him? No, Did he tell us, his friends, to abandon him? No.
    As for the father, he should have turned to the Lord and told him, I can’t do this on my own. I love my son but hate the sin. The son should have said, “Lord, this is my cross, help me to carry it.”
    Never, ever stop loving the sinner, because though we are forgiven, we too wore those same shoes.

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